Media Kit • Podcast Guest • Speaker

Helping men move from shame to resilience after betrayal

Duane Osterlind, LMFT, CSAT-S, brings 15+ years of clinical experience to every conversation — making the neuroscience of shame accessible, offering real hope without minimizing pain, and helping audiences understand what it actually takes to heal after infidelity.

Book Duane for Your Show →
15+ Years Clinical Experience
380+ Podcast Episodes Hosted
Top 100 Mental Health Podcast
CSAT-S Certified Supervisor
Duane Osterlind, LMFT — headshot for media and speaking

Speaker Bio

A therapist who speaks from experience, not theory.

Duane Osterlind is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and Certified Sex Addiction Therapist Supervisor (CSAT-S) based in Garden Grove, California. He is the co-founder of Novus Mindful Life Institute, host of The Addicted Mind Podcast — a Top 100 Apple Podcasts mental health show with 380+ episodes — and creator of Shame to Resilience, a structured program for men healing themselves and their relationships after infidelity and betrayal.

Duane's speaking style is warm, direct, and deeply human. He bridges clinical neuroscience with lived compassion — helping audiences understand why shame keeps people stuck, what betrayal trauma actually does to the brain, and how men can move from defensiveness into genuine accountability and repair.

He brings a perspective most audiences haven't heard: that the men who caused the harm can learn to show up differently — not through willpower or guilt, but through understanding shame, building empathy as a skill, and doing the relentless daily work of earned trust.

  • Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist (LMFT)
  • Certified Sex Addiction Therapist Supervisor (CSAT-S)
  • Co-founder, Novus Mindful Life Institute
  • Host, The Addicted Mind Podcast (380+ episodes, Top 100)
  • Creator, Shame to Resilience program

Talk Topics

What Duane Talks About

These are the conversations Duane has with podcast hosts, at workshops, and in clinical training rooms — grounded in research, shaped by real experience, and designed for audiences who want more than surface-level advice.

01

Why Shame Keeps Men Stuck After Infidelity

Most men who've caused betrayal feel terrible — but shame collapses them into defensiveness, withdrawal, or self-attack instead of empathy. Duane explains the Compass of Shame, the difference between healthy and toxic shame, and what it takes to sit with pain without running from it.

Shame Infidelity Men's Work

02

Betrayal Trauma: What's Actually Happening in Her Brain

Partners of men who've been unfaithful experience real trauma — amygdala hijack, hypervigilance, intrusive thoughts, emotional numbing. Duane explains the neurobiology in plain language and helps audiences understand why she "can't just move on" and what partners actually need to feel safe again.

Betrayal Trauma Neuroscience Couples

03

The Man Box: How Masculine Socialization Blocks Healing

Men are taught to be tough, solve problems alone, and never show vulnerability. These rules make it nearly impossible to do the emotional work that healing requires. Duane unpacks the research on masculine socialization and shows how men can redefine strength without losing themselves.

Masculinity Vulnerability Socialization

04

I Cheated — Now What? Rebuilding a Marriage After Betrayal

A practical, compassionate conversation about what actually works in the aftermath of infidelity. What to do first. How to rebuild trust step-by-step. Why most men get it wrong. And why the hardest work of repair isn't stopping the behavior — it's learning to be present for your partner's pain.

Relationship Repair Trust Accountability

05

Empathy as a Skill: Teaching Men to Attune

Most people think empathy is something you either have or you don't. Duane teaches it as a learnable skill — drawing on the Carkhuff empathy scale, Gottman's attunement model, and years of group work with men learning to listen without defending, fixing, or shutting down.

Empathy Attunement Communication

06

The Neuroscience of Addiction, Shame & Recovery

Duane makes brain science human. From dopamine pathways and the prefrontal cortex shutdown to the neuroplasticity that makes lasting change possible — he helps audiences understand why people do things they swore they'd never do, and why the brain can genuinely rewire with the right work.

Neuroscience Addiction Recovery

Great Fit For

Duane is a strong guest for shows about...

🎙

Mental Health & Therapy

Shame, trauma, addiction, clinical interventions, and the real process of healing.

👫

Relationships & Marriage

Infidelity recovery, rebuilding trust, couples work, and communication after betrayal.

💪

Men's Growth & Fatherhood

Masculine socialization, vulnerability, accountability, and becoming a better partner and father.

🧠

Neuroscience & Recovery

The brain science behind addiction, compulsive behavior, and neuroplasticity-based change.

Book Duane

Let's have a real conversation.

Duane brings warmth, clinical depth, and a perspective most audiences haven't heard. Whether you host a podcast about relationships, recovery, fatherhood, or mental health — he shows up prepared, generous with his time, and ready to go wherever the conversation needs to go.

Email Duane →

Email

duane@novusmindfullife.com

Phone

562-431-5100

Website

duaneosterlind.com

Podcast

theaddictedmind.com